Well, as it is Sunday and time for some light relief from a short hilarious quote, I offer you today the incomparable wit of Ambrose Bierce's 'Devil's Dictionary' on the subject of reliquaries.
RELIQUARY, n.
A receptacle for such sacred objects as pieces of the true cross,
short-ribs of the saints, the ears of Balaam's ass, the lung of the cock that called
Peter to repentance and so forth. Reliquaries are commonly of metal, and
provided with a lock to prevent the contents from coming out and performing
miracles at unseasonable times. A feather from the wing of the Angel of the
Annunciation once escaped during a sermon in Saint Peter's and so tickled the
noses of the congregation that they woke and sneezed with great vehemence three
times each. It is related in the "Gesta Sanctorum" that a sacristan in
the Canterbury cathedral surprised the head of Saint Dennis in the library.
Reprimanded by its stern custodian, it explained that it was seeking a body of
doctrine. This unseemly levity so raged the diocesan that the offender was
publicly anathematized, thrown into the Stour and replaced by another head of
Saint Dennis, brought from Rome.
