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| A random page from the collection |
Statement of Intent
It is high time,
dear reader, that I add one more category to the shortlist of serial subjects
which you find in the upper right-hand corner of my blog. That new title is the
Alfred B. Mittington Mayonnaise Label Collection.
Don’t frown.
Don’t snicker. Don’t groan. By now, you all know my infatuation with and my unwavering
devotion to the Golden Sauce, that precious Gift from the Gods by way of the
Egg and the Oil. So why should it come as a surprise that Alfred B. Mittington
has also dedicated a few decades of his plenteous lifetime to a Linnaeus-style
classification of bottled varieties of Mayonnaise, as they are available on the
markets of the diverse countries he travelled through and lived in? Nothing is
more obvious or helpful. For the Story of Mayonnaise is a rich and fascinating
one, dear reader, even when it concerns industrial products; and the choosing
of a good bottled Mayo, on those hapless occasions that you cannot whip up your
own, is a delicate and hazardous endeavour!
So I feel I have
my mandate! By occasionally posting samples from my large collection of
Mayonnaise Labels (roughly 200 items from two dozen countries), I will be
educating my fellow gourmets in the captivating Saga of the Sauce, and at the
same time lead him along that glorious but narrow path of culinary bliss,
warning him what traps and pitfalls to avoid, pointing out the stepping stones
that lead to safe havens, and – not to forget – denouncing, once and for all,
several unforgivable outrages which the captains of industry, those mental cousins
of cookbook authors, commit upon their innocent and defenceless clients.
Read it to your
advantage, dear reader! And never forget what the grand Chinese Sage said:
天堂之路潤滑良好的蛋黃醬
‘The road to heaven is
lubricated with good Mayonnaise’
[Confucius,
On Godly Food, Book II, § 13]
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